If I need to explain why this is another example of how gay men and the dominant culture do not respect or honor our own dignity, pain, and passion, then the cause of internalized self-worth in gay men is dead as well.
Toxic masculinity is not a symptom of being a man, it is a byproduct of ignoring natural masculine evolution. Boys need to evolve into men. Boy Energy needs to evolve into Mature Masculinity. Toxic Masculinity is, in fact, stagnate Boy Energy.
Hero culture has set an impossible and dangerous standard for men in this country. The John Wayne type of independent, self-reliant, emotionless icon has been replicated, digitized, and repacked into countless new action actors and movies. Now, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone, and Dwayne Johnson make up just the tip of the iceberg that is, unfortunately, [...]
As gay men, we spend so much of our lives existing in a world that is not built for us, we forget that there is an option to finding ways of “fitting in”. We can actually belong.
The Angst of Diminishing Superficial Beauty When I was 22, I sat across the table from a San Diego County Healthcare Worker who told me I had 6 to 18 months to live. That’s what they told newly diagnosed HIV positive men in 1987. It seemed that getting old was not a state of being [...]
A Trump presidency has exposed the pain and humiliation of million's of working people's unfulfilled American dream. This thought provoking article, written in October 2016, explains how we got here as a nation and suggests some "respectful confrontation" to move us forward. I LOVE that this is not an us vs. them article. The author [...]
Yesterday was the 40th anniversary of the largest gay massacre in America. I did not know that until I saw this post on Facebook today. In June of 1973 I was enjoying the summer break between my 2nd and 3rd grade years in grammar school. Forty years have gone by and not one of my educators mentioned [...]
Hello Shame. We need to talk. Why don't you sit your veil ass down over there in your favorite chair by the fire - the fire of my mind - that fire you had convinced me the world was not ready to see. Yeah, it's bright and beautiful isn't it? Shush! You've had your say. [...]
Transplants take root, but the echoes of our previous lives live deep inside us. I try to cover the tainted reverberations of small town youth with a gym body, fierceness, designer tennis shoes, and a biting wit - but the seed of discontent will always be with me. It lays dormant, unfed, and contained. I [...]